There's a nice story about Aristotle and his way of dealing with shallow talk by the three way filtering system. Once, he was entering his workplace when a man came running upto him, extremely out of breath. He started, 'Do you know the man around the corner just did?'. Aristotle thought for a second, and said, 'No, I don't. Do you know a man wastes 1/6 of his life discussing things which are of no consequence? So I've built this three filter system which will help me get rid of things which don't matter to me. I'll ask you three questions, and if it passes those, then you can tell me whatever you wanted to tell me. Now, does it have anything to do with me?'
The man, thought and said that it wasn't. Then Aristotle said, 'Ok, let's try again. Will it help me in any way?', to which the man again said that it wouldn't. Now, Aristotle took a deep breath and said, 'Ok, last question, will your information make me think any better of the man?', and the other once again replied that it wouldn't. Aristotle rose and said, 'Well then, if it has nothing to do with me, doesn't help me, and makes someone else look bad, then I'm not interested. Good day!', and he went inside. That, my friends, is true genius.
I use that filter system myself, most of the time, but usually I don't have to because people already know that I don't deal with gossip, and they refrain from telling me any nowadays, which I take as a really big compliment. Atleast, that way, when I talk people will know that I hold nothing but the truth, which is a great honour in itself. So do something about how people look at you, because at the end of the day, you can't live alone. You will be surrounded by people all your life. Intelligent people, talk about ideas. Shallow people, talk about other people. Which one are you?
well...you aren't going to be surrounded by intelligent people all your life so there will be times when you have to endure frivolous talk which may not concern you, even though you don't have to participate yourself.
Gossip is not constructive for sure..and probably causes more problems and misconceptions.
We all must have our filters as you've put it but showing them off to people may make us appear standoffish...it's better to use and keep our filters to ourselves, using them when necessary and not deliberately typecasting ourselves in another's view.
By Shikha Choudhury, at 11:38 AM